So the month of May has passed and I know it’s no longer M.E week but I finally feel clear headed enough to be getting on with my M.E week blogs.
Day 3, please feel free to look back over the past 2 days for a wee refresher, is to name something that makes you feel better. Well I have quite a few things that make me feel better so I am going to list them all.
Firstly is all the love and support I get from Nick. I don’t always appreciate everything he actually does for me. On days where everything hurts and I feel so ill and depressed that I just want everyone and thing to disappear I am blind to just how much he has given up to look after me. However on my good days I see how much he truly loves me and knowing that instantly makes me feel better.
Second is Sam. He knows when I am having a really bad day and he snuggles up with me so I am never alone. Just seeing his happy wee face brightens my day.
Thirdly is my uber wonderful friend Catherine. Everyone needs a friend like her. She is always ready to listen and never judges. She has the most horrific sense of humour, just like I do, which makes for some hilarious daily snap chats. We love all the same awful movies and she is more than willing for me to turn up at her house in my PJ and watch them with me. Plus she doesn’t mind that when she is invited for dinner she is put to work and has to leave before 8pm so I can go to bed. The best friend a girl could ask for.
Forth and finally is Buttons. I am an actual crazy lady when it comes to buttons. I find it so soothing sorting them out into matching pairs and colours. It’s the reason I decided to start up Buttons and Sam as I got to combine my love for jewellery and buttons, plus I wanted an excuse to shop for more buttons to add to my ever growing collection.
Since I got my diagnosis, for a second time, last year I have been slowly trying to teach myself to not care about what others think of me. It’s so hard as we all want to be loved, accepted and valued. I feel, and know, that when I tell people I have a chronic illness so I don’t work as I am concentrating on getting better, that they judge me. They look at me as a slacker or someone who just doesn’t want to have to work so probably lives off benefits. I have to keep reminding myself every time someone asks me that question that their opinion actually doesn’t matter. The reason I am teaching myself to do this is that I want to get better. I want to go back to work and start a family one day, but that won’t happen if I don’t get better and I won’t get better if I am constantly worried about what people think of me and listening to their negative opinions. I need to fill my mind and thoughts with positivity.